RESURRECT DEAD ON PLANET JUPiTER

Tinfoil Hat

In rank order, 1 being the most likely and 4 being the least likely, here’s what paranoid people everywhere believe happened to Ken Lay.

1. Killed by parties unknown before August 1st disclosure of all previously undisclosed $.
2. Hanging out with Tupac and living it up with said undisclosed $.
3. Suicide, covered up by family members in a feeble attempt to retain last pathetic vestiges of Lay family honor.
4. heart attack.