RESURRECT DEAD ON PLANET JUPiTER

Aged Wisdom - monday reflections

Generally, I think I was a whole lot smarter when I was 18. I was reading more interesting things, having more interesting thoughts and asking more interesting questions. My brain felt like it was firing faster, brighter and smarter than it does today.

Not that I’m a dullard or anything. I’m better now at just about everything I do than I was then. I have a clearer understanding of myself and the people around me. I’m more confident, skilled and experienced. But for the most part, I feel less… something.

Which brings me to today’s bit of aged wisdom. As I slowly creep up on the ripe old age of 30 (now before you all get all on me for being ‘young’ Jesus died 33 and Jimi Hendrix at 27) something has become clear to me.

I once thought I could live a life without regret. Somehow at age 18 I thought this was possible. Now I may have felt smarter then, but this notion is bananas. I regret everything. Anytime I make a decision, I regret the infinite number of decisions that I didn’t make because I made the one I made. This makes it very hard for me to make decisions. Maybe by the time I’m 40 I’ll have this all sorted out.

In the meantime I place my faith in a quantum universe, or in the idea that somewhere out there I’ve taken every path. That’s all for now.