[dovate.com] » Search Awards
Here we go again. It’s time for the June Search Awards. These 25 strings of text are the most bizarre search terms that led people to this site in last month. I hope nobody found what they were looking for…. Except for number 17.
25. riot threads duffle bag
24. sexual predator in strawberry mansion area
23. www.aghfanistan sex.com
22. vagina creempie eater
21. mastrubating kangaroo
20. claws ripping
19. air rifle target practice in bars of soap
18. cruising spots and berks county and blow job
17. urinals peep holes
16. diane keller nude
15. what does michael jackson look like
14. pussy birthing
13. hot rectum
12. demonic love
11. lude gestures
10. today i spent 2 hours caught in a fuckin’ traffic jam coming back from work as i sat in the fuckin’ snarl watchin’ the faces of other drivers who looked like they were ready to break stuff i realised that how every single fuckin’ thing
9. humourus garden statues drunken clown
8. doily meaning origin and the person behind and place where it originated
7. finger method for peeing
6. motel strap on
5. she takes a fever thermometer into my rectum
4. white vinegar and valium withdrawal
3. attacks while i am sleeping can’t move demon intercourse chills up spine
2. dovate on genitals
1. tits they’re fucking awesome
Yes, it’s that time of the month! May produced an interesting and varied crop of search hits here at dovate.com. As always, I’ve gone through the search strings that led people to this site and posted my favorites for public consumption:
25. fotos d anorexia
24. jumpshot drug
23. kangaroo mating movie
22. bird repellant window reflection
21. condom catheter one way valve
20. dead jewish kids
19. inventions
18. www a lot of nacid girls.com
17. necronomicon spirit board
16. whats drug is in didrex and adipex
15. first time blowjob
14. existential hippies
13. believe it or not george isn’t at home
12. please dont commit suicide
11. how to keep my neighbors aggressive dogs off my lawn with ropel?
10. wierd pussy birthing
9. what are some pictures of what are city will look like in the future
8. inbred mountain men
7. netti pot disadvantages
6. snorting ropel
5. mr.big biggest
4. john madden old fork and spoon
3. my darling i’m hunger for your touch
2. brown foods racial
1. mastrubating for islam
Every month I check my stats and pull out my favorite search referrals. These are search terms that people enter into google or yahoo or possibly even lycos to find my site. Over the past few months, the hits have gone from 30% insane to only 5-10%. Whether that’s reflective of the site’s recent content or of new algorithms over at google I don’t know. Whatever the trouble is, the recent insane search deficit has forced cuts in the totals. Down from over 30 just a few months ago, here are April’s top 20. Enjoy:
20. my own birds repellent frequency
19. custom storm trooper suit
18. his massive buttocks
17. r.i.p love park
16. party and bust a nut
15. tiny blowjob
14. construction hardhats for sale in reno
13. bigfoot sightings 2007
12. fuck buddies near oil city pa
11. dog crap pickup kempton
10. ball shaving
9. pictures of dogs with penis out
8. black and white photos love
7. what are these indicative of voice tremors pitch changes facial twitches and shaking
6. anorexia africa
5. drawings of jewish people during jesus’s time
4. spacecraft music
3. gay donkey porn
2. netti v casual encounter
1. did the nazis have a motto
Since a week of April has come and gone, I guess it’s time for the March search awards. These things ebb and flow. Last month I had a hard time whittling it down to 33, this months I had trouble finding 25. While this months search results aren’t the best ever, the top spot is among my favorite of all time.
As always, the search awards are interesting search terms culled from my site stats every month. I monitor the terms that lead people here and post my favorites each month. Here’s March:
25. repellent dirt professor email
24. sagan de hades
23. wanted mosaic tiler darwin
22. the prettiest hawk in the world in the wild
21. philly greaseball
20. shadow of a crucifix
19. sexe nacid wimin wherin nutin
18. rabbit shadow hand
17. scariest shadow
16. yugo smoke
15. spiritual reality behind and beyond the phenomenon
14. freaky intercourse
13. gay sex louisiana park rest area
12. natural scenery of america
11. shadow zone darkest days
10. married women looking for sex in oil city pa
9. funny vulture
8. rabid vulture
7. hiding out in kempton pa
6. is cum in the anus harmful
5. nantucket -nectars -sound -wind
4. horny bike seat
3. amish ketamine
2. natural ear positioning schnauzer
1. pit bull language of whispers snorts grunts
Yes, it’s that time of the month! As always, I’ve spent the last month monitoring the search terms that led people to dovate.com and picked the best for the monthly round-up:
33. skull surrounded in shadow
32. a real picture of saturn?
31. homemade turkey sandwich
30. gay spring
29. mastrubating my pussy in public
28. apes mastrubating
27. mastrubating among animals pictures
26. amish girl balled
25. there was a young man from stamboul who soliloquized
24. tiny garden gnome
23. latest invention
22. hades the place
21. philadelhia baltimore inferiority complex
20. fierce white tigers
19. double vagina
18. craigslist hyperdimensional resonator
17. and incommensurable orders of being is a mental act of human intellects and it is a disputable one present day medical and psychological
16. homemade bird repellent
15. walker evans bathroom in the dog run photo
14. indian penis color
13. snorting tramacet
12. eating nuts and alcohol breathalizer
11. leg stocking bitch
10. verjan girl fuking
9. who’s that clown at my desk?
8. eagle vulture
7. dead bodies found in wissahickon valley pa
6. is fucking a dog safe
5. how many yugo convertibles were sold in the uk
4. picture of japanese fighter pilot on meth
3. history of ape human
2. jewish things
1. what would be a reason why a female could not bust a nut
Yeah I know it’s Valentine’s day and February is half over, but I figured better late than never with last month’s search awards. Why the delay? To tell you the truth, January was pretty weak. I thought maybe google improved their software… but after a couple weeks of February hits I promise that next months awards will be better. With that said, there are some good ones in here.
In case you’re unaware of what search awards are, every month I pore over my search stats and pull out the most bizarre. At the beginning of the month (usually) I post the best of the best. Here’s January:
30. dovate storm troopers
29. what is it for dovate ointment
28. george w bush child as a baby
27. charles darwin as a kid
26. blueball pain
25. pigeon shit kid
24. prescription underwear
23. chubby fucking horse
22. pictures of dogs with erected penis
21. free hi res gorilla pictures
20. coloration of penis\
19. alpha sterol
18. noblesville cocksuckers
17. easily confused words rob/steal travel/ trip
16. hot amish girls
15. horse vagina
14. retard running
13. cramp in the groin
12. molly pitcher wedding photography
11. curly haired celebrities
10. bigfoot sightings in berks
9. beautiful mary demons
8. i shit you not it was this big cat
7. the man with the giant penis
6. retard hands
5. disadvantages of mastrubating
4. harmful effects of a netti pot
3. crossing human and ape
2. celebrity genetalia size
1. mummers pissing
Finally, the end of the year list everyone has been waiting for. Here are the 79 most interesting search terms that led people to dovate.com in 2007. Why 79? Why not? In addition to being an interesting lens into the collective consciousness of the internet browsing public, many of them also make excellent band names:
79. space jesus
78. abstract cop
77. pictures of fetus after using colon cleanse
76. what is that hippie smell
75. scum derivation
74. david hasselhoff colon irrigation
73. colon cleanse on 2nd in market phila
72. ’smiling anus’
71. my broken mind psychosis why
70. looking at a flickering fluorescent light
69. hippopotamus shit territory
68. artificial girl illusion
67. yearly deaths by donkey kicks
66. fetal skull for sale
65. bigfoot fucking females on porn
64. unaligned dragon
63. is licking anus harmful?
62. is my girlfriend a prostitute?
61. homemade squirrel spray repellent
60. how to repel dogs off of my property with chemicals
59. hippopotamus elephant mating video clip
58. red bellied woodpecker and the bible
57. chimps attack
56. schnauzer genitals
55. piss drinking indigestion
54. nude pictures of girls hunting grouse
53. what makes keith haring so fucking great?
52. neo swank dresses
51. metaphysical vortex
50. metaphysical bigfoot
49. arnold schwarzenegger really is reptillian
48. short clown ghost stories
47. goth pony
46. crack whore repellent
45. how many people goes through the tollbooth on the benjamin franklin bridge
44. how to kick off mastrubating
43. bigfoot cock
42. light dispelling darkness nj archive weird
41. ideal duck cages
40. i saw my cleaning lady naked
39. methamphetamine parasite terrorists
38. billy pilgrim diagnosis
37. sublime drunken clown
36. is it safe to eat my own ejaculate
35. replica rubber fetuses
34. hit by watermelon dies of heart attack
33. foodery cat
32. falcon cock porn
31. difference between mummer and mutter
30. yearly deaths from spoons
29. high definition pumpkins
28. spork utensil statistics
27. gay shiny
26. alabama crack whores
25. steel reserve hoodie
24. why are birds crows seagulls pigeons dangerous to man?
23. slaughterhouse 5 candybar
22. suicide pigeons
21. minimalist christmas tree
20. can african elephants camouflage themselves
19. military industrial complex photo archive
18. arsenio hall blacklist jews
17. verbal communication amish
16. how would a human being fare on the planet saturn
15. do male testicle stink?
14. buy hitech chastity belt made of steel
13. shakespeare schwarzenegger
12. what is common between martha stewart and stephen hawking
11. porn apes
10. seaworld intangible elements
9. barak obama for klingon high council leader
8. how i lost my job girlfriend apartment rabbit food
7. korean screaming pussy
6. my 20 month old son’s breath stinks
5. anus picket pony
4. gay hangouts to prostitute my body
3. clown gags and teenagers
2. proper attire for dayton ohio cocktail party
1. obama and his correlation to the number 666
Before November’s search awards are presented, I have an announcement for my dovate.com shareholders.
Last month, tragedy struck the site. For reasons that I’m not sure of and don’t care to investigate, my google rank plummeted. My search hits, which reached an October peak around 1600, (that’s 55 misguided freaks arriving daily) dropped to a November total of 610. For some reason, my google images hits are as aggressive as ever, with thousands of hits a month. Unfortunately, I don’t get search term reports for image searches.
While all these stats are modest and this site remains tiny regardless if the number is 600 or 1600, these numbers have a huge impact on the search awards. This month had hundreds less search terms to peruse. That means that I had to work what I had. With options diminished, I was forced to go for shock value over wit. This means that I’ve let a bit more incest and bestiality slip into the top 30. With that said, enjoy:
30. clothing of the holy lands
29. old world rat skull
28. duck holding shotgun
27. free rottweiler mating movies
26. mastrubating walk public town
25. singing embryo video
24. google videos american prostitudes fucking
23. crystal clear family fucking
22. name checks fbi november 2007
21. fanning in underwear
20. boss beam boring machine
19. nude lady vagina with hair
18. creepiest cat signs
17. inside elephant vagina pictures
16. caught son eating own cum
15. kid dies from mastrubating
14. mastrubating with dad
13. dancing pecker
12. free pierced nipples
11. rhinoceros mating bestiality
10. how much are clowns paid in ringley brothers circus
9. suicide pigeons
8. falcon cock porn
7. goth pony
6. chimps attack
5. minimalist christmas tree
4. crack whore repellent
3. verbal communication amish
2. bigfoot fucking females on porn
1. korean screaming pussy
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, 75% of my search hits are porn related. The thing is, I get the really, really freaky shit. As always, this months search awards are heavy on bizarre fetishes. I’ve filtered out the racist and child porn related search hits and left nothing but the the alien-fucking, pigeon anus searching crème de la crème. All that and the usual top 30 bizarre search hits from the past month are listed here:
30. amish goth
29. naked porn
28. 20lb booty
27. alien fuck human female
26. is fucking a dog safe
25. intercourse of pennies and vagina
24. will an electronic rodent repeller bother my rabbit
23. video of recent possible bigfoot sighting in pa
22. big bird piss christ hillary
21. the evolution of underwear
20. soldier underwear
19. facts and pictires of baby dung beetles
18. jim morrison defecating
17. penis documentary
16. christopher walken pumpkin stencil
15. goose anus
14. pigeon human anus
13. emo suicide correlation
12. sell frozen cum
11. prog cock
10. caught my dad mastrubating
9. i saw my 13 yr old ejaculate
8. unaligned dragon
7. dovate medical side affects
6. how many people goes through the tollbooth on the benjamin franklin bridge
5. billy pilgrim diagnosis
4. difference between mummer and mutter
3. can african elephants camouflage themselves
2. what should be the minimum size of a men pennis to have sex with women?
1. porn apes
So it’s Almost mid-October and I haven’t posted last months search awards. What can I say, I’m busy. Here are last months most amusing search hits:
30. homemade groundhog killers
29. the federalist papers 15 problems
28. skeleton pegasus
27. blogs girls mating pictures
26. the medieval social pyramid
25. different types of golems
24. brett favre out of the closet
23. best website for crack whores
22. chimp clans
21. fbi name check piece of crap
20. humans are pawns
19. friends saw flat chest
18. what part of vagina is broken when it fucked first time
17. strange street signs found all of philadelphia new jersey venus
16. eating frozen cum
15. paranormal object vagina covered with hair
14. toynbee idea spreads across the world
13. what is the meaning of a hawk’s visit to my window
12. licking human deceased bodies
11. seaworld’s commitment to mother earth
10. abstract cop
9. colon cleanse on 2nd in market phila
8. is licking anus harmful?
7. piss drinking indigestion
6. how to stop mastrubating yourself
5. silicon slimy thing washed up on beach
4. yearly deaths from spoons
3. high definition pumpkins
2. cyborg citizens 666
1. shakespeare schwarzenegger
These search awards are dedicated to my new readers in the national defense industry. While browsing yesterday’s site stats I saw that ranking in the top 20 requesting hosts were the U.S. Army and the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency or DARPA. So, welcome. If I’ve drawn your attention because of my sharp wit and smart commentary, then stick around and enjoy yourself. If I’ve been assessed as a national security threat, then please move along, because dovate.com is at best a negligible national security threat.
Most likely, I just used the word “skyscraper” and “New York” too many times in yesterday’s post.
But anyway, it’s time for this months search awards. Aside from listing hosts and referring sites, I get a daily list of the search terms that led people to this site. Every month I pick out the top 30-35 and post them here for all to get creeped out by. Here’s August:
35. what birds like cherry blossoms
34. philadelphia buy things with crack
33. how do the amish deal with extreme heat
32. bodybuilding buldge
31. dung ball washed up on the ocean
30. pictures of dogs that live in a dumpster
29. speed skater buttocks
28. what is a thermonuclear attack
27. dead serial killer found in amusement park in manitoba
26. art anus pic
25. masturbating on meth
24. goth hawk
23. christian pumpkin pictures
22. fucking at 19 old dog
21. rubber lifesize mannequins
20. blowjob short story
19. weird tiles on the ground philidelphia
18. gay elephants mating
17. real alien pictures encounter s and videos
16. how to make replica of kelp
15. shock photos what you never see
14. shadow beings found me
13. opossum attacks yearly statistics
12. video clip of my friends vagina
11. cocaine online
10. pictures of fetus after using colon cleanse
9. my broken mind psychosis why
8. is my girlfriend a prostitute?
7. nude pictures of girls hunting grouse
6. how to kick off mastrubating
5. im scared im going to get caught mastrubating
4. how not to get caught mastrubating
3. i saw my son mastrubating
2. saw dad mastrubating
1. how i lost my job girlfriend apartment rabbit food
For the first time since March, the word vagina has lost its top spot among leading search terms at dovate.com. During its 3 months of domination, vagina sat firmly on top of the stats. In the past 31 days however, crestfallen vagina struggled to keep pace with crack whores, local whores and philadelphia whores, all of which all registered more hits during the month of July.
Interestingly, dovate.com contains scarce information on vagina, crack or local prostitution; however continued repetition of the words in posts like this one are guaranteed to fool google far into the future.
And now a word of commentary:
I’ve noticed that vagina, whore or whatever, people out there are overwhelmingly searching for 1 thing: sex. But how strange and varied that one thing can be. Represented among this months 1100 or so search terms are perversions including but not limited to, elk, dog, hippo, elephant and monkey bestiality, general pedophilia and every imaginable variation of semen obsession. The vast majority of my search hits are from people looking for sex, porn, violent images or videos and of course, Toynbee tiles (The 8th most popular search term, edging out donkey mating videos by 1 hit was “Toynbee idea.”)
As I’ve said before, my choices for the top 30 search spots are fairly representative of the search terms overall. Here are the winners for July:
30. average male testicle photos
29. good bible quotes for good morning
28. modern mastrubating methods pic
27. please find me the images of animals by the name of hawk
26. people having sex while butt naked
25. my girlfriend nude pictures
24. molly pitcher fucking vids
23. public vagina
22. tiny little bugs tiny little bodies tentacles kempton
21. free homemade marijuana garden rodent repellent
20. sleazy nut squeezing
19. heartless shadow
18. how to make cockrings
17. repelling crawdads
16. gay hangouts in alabama
15. best places to fuck in philly
14. get the fuck off the internet
13. music converted into laser by german scientists
12. co worker steal parking space
11. disadvantages of men mastrubating information
10. i eat every drop of my own semen
9. what is that hippie smell
8. david hasselhoff colon irrigation
7. schnauzer genitals
6. employment phila mura1 art5 pr0gram (edits mine)
5. is it safe to eat my own ejaculate
4. gay shiny
3. military industrial complex photo archive
2. seaworld intangible elements
1. my 20 month old son’s breath stinks
June’s search awards have been delayed by an early July vacation. The middling month’s top search terms are arranged thematically for your reading pleasure. It’s almost like poetry:
30. kangaroo mating video live
29. smoking crack with crackwhores
28. hookers at truckstops
27. the reality of reanimation experiments
26. sodomizing my girlfriend
25. shiny vagina
24. human vagina pictures
23. tall vagina eater
22. human being mating video
21. does broccoli make vagina stink?
20. elements in dust and in the human body
19. island on special spaghetti samosas were bowled at baguettes
18. close up display of real sue’s skull
17. pictures of molly pitcher catering
16. photoblog of girls in my school
15. ive being seeing shadows
14. being a good witness
13. lsd spiritual rebirth
12. pictures of someone fucking a dog
11. emo suicide
10. im insane!!!! video
9. fetal skull for sale
8. how to repel dogs off of my property with chemicals
7. short clown ghost stories
6. i saw my cleaning lady naked
5. buying meth in philly
4. are pigeons dangerous
3. arsenio hall blacklist jews
2. michael nutter grandmother jewish?
1. obama and his correlation to the number 666
As I do every month, here are my favorite 30 search terms that brought people to dovate.com. With no further ado:
30. cottman and torresdale exact location
29. free piss
28. replica rubber fetuses
27. what makes short story short according to edgar allan poe
26. beautiful broccoli
25. boar vagina
24. who won the superbowl in 1941
23. naked teens without anything on
22. human fetal skull for sale
21. dated a prostitute
20. old mummer fucking
19. homemade groundhog spray
18. being in love emo
17. constipated rat
16. bird defecates on president bush may 2007
15. reptillian world leaders with photo
14. if you let a pigeon out of your house will it come back
13. dead gambit
12. south street philadelphia occult history
11. disrespect for the dead curse
10. caught my 13 year old son mastrubating what should i do
9. yearly deaths by donkey kicks
8. homemade squirrel spray repellent
7. arnold schwarzenegger really is reptillian
6. ideal duck cages
5. hit by watermelon dies of heart attack
4. alabama crack whores
3. slaughterhouse 5 candybar
2. what is common between martha stewart and stephen hawking
1. gay hangouts to prostitute my body
April saw an enormous spike in search terms referencing animal mating videos and vagina. People were led here after googling boar, kangaroo, elephant, rhino, wild pony, pigeon, hippo, elk, donkey, horse, monkey, rottweiler and bear mating videos. Many of these terms had multiple hits and/or word variations.
In addition, dovate.com saw an enormous surge of interest in vagina. The word itself was responsible for 13 unique hits. In addition to these, I saw vagina associated with: licking, tight, scary, broken, old, poison oak, inside, real peoples, best, whore and a couple others that are just a little too disturbing to repeat here.
Unfortunately, every single one of these searches was fruitless. There are no animal mating videos or vagina information here, and I’m not planning on changing format.
But anyway, as I do every month, here are my favorite 30 search terms, vagina be damned:
30. wall of kelp
29. extra sensory perception disclosure
28. garbage lady
27. unplanned cumshot
26. hyper dimensional resonator diagram
25. dovate reanimation of dog
24. naked old guy
23. pig template
22. human anus pic
21. colon cleansing new kensington pa
20. alien fuck
19. dog fuckins
18. cast fetish chat
17. who won the superbowl in 1918
16. selling love
15. urban outfitters huffing
14. theodore roethke root cellar is disgusting
13. barbaro news
12. gay helicopter
11. make me feel safe
10. space jesus
9. artificial girl illusion
8. licking is harmful
7. metaphysical bigfoot
6. dreams about excrement in a bathtub
5. foodery cat
4. steel reserve hoodie
3. where to buy meth in philly
2. buy hitech chastity belt made of steel
1. proper attire for dayton ohio cocktail party
As I do every month, I pore over the hundreds of search terms that brought people to dovate.com and post my favorites here:
30: hetero tiles
29: rhino mating video clips
28: youtube elephant mating
27: drunk girl laying by a dumpster pictures
26: cleaning lady caught masturbating
25: pictures molly pitcher dead
24: a picture of molly pitcher’s hair
23: what does the mutter museum contain
22: monkey eat own semen video
21: angry short prose stories
20: short story of a crab broker
19: buttnaked nuns
18: grouse hunting blogs
17: is licking envelopes harmful to a fetus
16: did columbine killers read edgar allen poe
15: importance of knowing how to change a tire
14: how a man make his friend mastrubating
13: broccoli man
12: self inflicted life affirming hell
11: colon cleansing pictures and facts
And here are the cream of the crop:
10: ’smiling anus’
9: gg elvis
8: red bellied woodpecker and the bible
7: metaphysical vortex
6: bigfoot cock
5: methamphetamine parasite terrorists
4: why are birds crows seagulls pigeons dangerous to man?
3: psychosis for a long time
2: bed dovate
1: anus picket pony
Following are my favorite 30 search terms culled from my site stats from February 2007:
30: essay to describe myself for interview
29: horrible dream
28: picture of someone crawling through back of pick up truck
27: pretentious
26: suicide writing
25: where are philadelphia squatters
24: a world map showing where dung beetles live
23: eat own ejaculate
22: why did walker evans come to bethlehem?
21: roller pigeon
20: nuns mastrubating
19: cock splitting
18: a picture of molly pitcher’s face
17: landing pod
16: seat belt trapped upside down
15: lemurtastic (*note: I know who you are)
14: possum skeletons
13: orange lumps in semen
12: art ejaculations pictures -female
11: strange clown cars
—
10: scum derivation
9: hippopotamus shit territory
8: hippopotamus elephant mating video clip
7: neo swank dresses
6: john madden’s childhood
5: replica rubber fetuses
4: crazy eagles
3: why stephen hawking held his breath under water
2: do male testicle stink?
1: barak obama for klingon high council leader
During the month of January, my site statistics registered 363 search hits from a total of 285 unique search terms. How people randomly stumble across the site is always an interesting thing. Following is a list of the top 30 search terms from January ‘07. (*not the most popluar search terms, but the top 30 of my own choosing) I don’t think any of these people found what they were looking for… or let me rephrase that and say that I hope to hell they (most of them) didn’t find what they were searching for. What a strange world we live in:
30: dumpster pictures throwing away garbage
29: dead bodies photos blood gore
28: piece of concrete came down on my car
27: strangest restaurants in philadelphia
26: gay butt
25: when to busting a nut.com
24: molly pitcher path to fame
23: last exit in new jersey
22: lost in the wissahickon valley
21: common loon video
20: nut stroking
19: pigeons
18: butt dances
17: penn professor bludgeons wife
16: busting a nut in public
15: sheepfuckers
14: defining qualities of south philly
13: cult men drinking sperm
12: unique facts about molly pitcher
11: etymology | origin | derived | derivation scum | cum semen | ejaculate
—–
10: dovate scientology
9: looking at a flickering fluorescent light
8: hyperdimensional resonator test result
7: what makes keith haring so fucking great?
6: light dispelling darkness nj archive weird
5: sublime drunken clown
4: blood and gore everywhere and you didnt bring a spoon
3: spork utensil statistics
2: how would a human being fare on the planet saturn
1: clown gags and teenagers
